If You Can’t Find a Spouse Who Supports Your Career, Stay Single

Despite advances in gender equity, many professionally ambitious women still struggle to find balance between their career and that of their partner. While these spouses are happy to have successful, high-earning wives, they are often caught off guard by trade-offs they were not expecting. All too often, they will applaud their wives’ ambitions — but only until those ambitions start to interfere with their own careers. These wives’ disillusionment is deep and long-lasting, and it may be contributing to the increasing trend of “gray divorce:” 60% of divorces for older, decades-married couples are initiated by women, often leaving their husbands blindsided and heartbroken. The lesson: Retaining women (whether at home or in the office) takes skill, self-awareness, and a real commitment to a future in which both members of a marriage get the chance to fulfill their potential.